giving it up

so much confusion,
my thoughts don't seem to make sense,
sometimes I regret not saying it all,
am I losing another chance?
what if you were gone tomorrow?
would I miss you at all?
what if I can't ever make you proud?
can my best please be enough?
I couldn't save you,
neither could you,
I couldn't bare it,
not having you here was way too much,
I started giving it all up,
won't you tell me where you are?
I started losing my touch,
won't you tell me where to stop?
I wish you wouldn't turn your back,
cause every second is killing me,
I wish I could go back to the start,
won't you come back and play your part?